Above: Odeya Rush and Jack Black star in “Goosebumps.” Photo ©Sony Pictures Entertainment and Village
Roadshow Pictures
During a lecture on the basics of
writing in the new “Goosebumps” movie, author R.L. Stine (Jack Black) explains
that all stories are made up of three parts: “The beginning, the middle…and the
twist!” Unfortunately, while
“Goosebumps” features all of those, that’s not enough to make it a great film,
or even really a good one. The movie
does its best to live up to the pedigree of the horror novellas it's based off
of, but is so mired in cliché and mediocrity that it ends up being a
well-intentioned but rather dull affair.
“Goosebumps” begins, as many of the books that
inspired it do, with a move to an unfamiliar location. Teenager Zach Cooper (Dylan Minnette) and his
mother Gale (Amy Ryan) go from bustling New York to the quiet suburbs of
Madison, DE, where Zach unexpectedly befriends dorky classmate Champ (Ryan Lee)
and neighbor Hannah (Odeya Rush).
Hannah is the heir to a notorious legacy—her shut-in father is Robert
Lawrence Stine, author of the long-running “Goosebumps” series. We learn that the monsters from Stine’s books
actually exist in the pages of his manuscripts, and can be released into the
real world once they're opened. Not
surprisingly, a misunderstanding leads to the opening of the books, the
unleashing of Stine’s monsters, and a rampage across Madison that forces the
unlikely quartet of Zach, Hannah, Champ, and Stine to try and trap the beasts
back in their paper-and-ink prison.
In other words, “Goosebumps” is “The Monster Squad” meets “Wes Craven’s
New Nightmare”—not a bad starting point for a child-friendly horror romp. Sadly, the child-friendly part of the equation
necessitates child characters, something that gives “Goosebumps” a major
stumble. While Zach and Hannah are
serviceable enough as leads and the actors have decent chemistry with each
other, the characters are written so blandly that they make the whole film seem
sluggish. Their pretty faces and quirky
banter are never enough to really engage, the twist with Hannah's backstory
ends up meaning nothing, and Zach’s character arc (he learns to “let people in
again” after the passing of his father) feels so half-hearted that it makes me
wonder if the only reason the filmmakers included it is because main
characters, y’know, need an arc.
Attempting to compensate, the script (by Darren Lemke of “Jack the Giant
Slayer”) fills in the edges of the story with quirkier characters in the hopes
of bringing the laughs—most of which fall short. Champ is the sort of comic relief sidekick
who’s only funny when he’s being berated by someone else, but at the very
least, Ryan Lee has been playing parts like these for years and has the act
down pat. Other supporting players like
Jillian Bell, Ken Marino, and that guy who plays Jonah on “Veep” all do fine
work and elevate some of the film's attempts at humor, but then again, not much
is asked of them.
The real star of the show is, unsurprisingly, Jack Black. His version of Stine acts as a parallel to
Zach, but to the extreme: Stine is a recluse who never made real friends, but
created his own in the pages of his stories. His character arc is sold more potently than
Zach’s, and Mr. Black clearly has fun playing Stine, painting him as a
sometimes-manic paranoid who sometimes can’t help but brag about his success
(especially when he’s compared to that hack “Steve King”).
The effects of Stine’s creatures aren’t exactly game-breaking, but in a
story like this where humor and horror are meant to mix, that can be forgiven. The ringleader of the monsters, the recurring
“Goosebumps” baddie Slappy the Dummy (voiced by Mr. Black), is rendered as an
actual puppet and is effectively spooky. Really, more than anything, “Goosebumps” is a
greatest hits parade of Stine’s creations (including a giant praying mantis, an
overgrown Venus fly trap, and an army of zombies and ghouls), one that shows
off the wide variety of horrors the author committed to the page, but doesn't
really linger on them long enough to make them more than a quick scare to run
away from.
Even still, I’m inclined to forgive a lot of the shortcomings of
“Goosebumps.” This movie wasn’t made for
me. It was made for people who read and
loved the books; the kinds of fans who would delight in trying to name every
monster onscreen the same way I would delight in naming every mutant in an
“X-Men” flick. Yes, “Goosebumps” is
awkwardly paced and hangs its story on uninteresting leads, but it’s harmless
and features enough humor and monster action to keep the little ones
entertained. If you loved the books or
just like this brand of spook house fun, check it out.
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